For The Times That We Were Free
by Ocean-Eyed Angel
Summary: Draco Malfoy has turned from the ways of Voldemort, after the betrayal of everyone he thought he knew. The one person he never expected to escape with, was the only one who'd seemed to understand what it was like to long for freedom, and impossibilities.
1. Summary

Summary:

Draco Malfoy's life as a Death-Eater is all but over. He does not trust, he can not, not after the betrayal of his family and everyone he thought was on his side. He needs something to make him believe in good again, or someone. Either way, even turning from darkness to light can have its complications. Unused to something like freedom, Draco builds stone walls around his heart to save himself from the dark days of his past. But as they say, we build these walls to see them knocked down.


	2. The Désespoir Room

**_Chapter 1: _The _Désespoir_ Room**

Draco sat in an armchair next to the fire that cast its sparse heat into the Great Room in Malfoy Manor. Bellatrix was pacing the floor behind him, muttering incoherently, her brow furrowed. His father and Yaxley had gone to retrieve the Lovegood girl from the Hogwarts Express to punish her father for his articles in that absurd magazine of his.

_Serves him right for such disrespect for the Dark Lord._

Draco had seen Luna only once, in his sixth year, when he had sought solace on the grounds. He had been sitting on the edge of the lake in the misty dawn when he heard a light humming coming from the other side of the vast black pool. He had relied on the mist to hide him, and perhaps it did, for she did not appear to notice him. She had drifted along the edge of the lake, barefoot, trailing her toes in the water and laughing as the Giant Squid's tentacles danced along with her.

_Strange. _He had thought. He wistfully remembered the freedom he had had that day, before he had been given the task of killing Albus Dumbledore.

The door banged open, making Draco jump. Bellatrix stopped pacing as she watched Lucius and Yaxley drag the Stunned Luna across the threshold.

"Draco, bring the girl below."

Without a word he rose from the chair and flicked his wand at her, the Non-Verbal Spell making her rise a few feet into the air. He flicked his wand again, and she floated towards the stairs. He guided her down into the inner chambers of Malfoy Manor, until they reached the _Désespoir_ Room. He called it the _Désespoir_ Room, which meant hopelessness.

"_Alohamora_." He whispered. The door clicked open, and he waved his wand and felt a sickening mixture of pleasure and revulsion as her body thudded to the floor.

"_Enervate." _Luna stirred, and he watched her blinking slowly, glancing around confusedly. She rubbed her head where it had made contact with the stone floor.

"Draco?" she said, confused. "Where am I? What are you doing?" she said, taking in Draco's raised wand, and fierce eyes.

"You're in Malfoy Manor," he said.

She opened her mouth a question forming on her lips, but Draco didn't give her the chance.

"Your father has been disrespecting the Dark Lord. This'll make him see that we have no tolerance for such things. Figure the rest out yourself."

She did not cry, or even look all that frightened, as Draco had expected, in fact, she smiled a little.

"I'm not going to die here, Draco. We both know that. You're whole family may be Death Eaters, but we both know you're not like that. Like _them._" She said, gesturing to the ceiling, indicating the people above. His composure slipped, his smirk slackened, her words as surprising as a splash of cold water.

Anger flared in Draco, and he flicked his wand, which slashed a deep cut in her arm. She cried out, and with satisfaction Draco saw the tears in her eyes. But even as he turned to leave, the heavy stone door slamming behind him, her words still echoed in his head. _We both know you're not like that. Like _them_._

_She's wrong. _He told himself. _I'm a Death Eater, and a Malfoy. I'm loyal to Voldemort. This is the winning side. This is where I belong._

Was that true?

He barely dared to think it let alone say it out loud.

That maybe he wasn't like them.

That maybe he belonged on the other side of this war.


	3. No

_**Chapter 2**__**: **__**No**_

__Draco stormed up the stairs, the door of the _Désespoir _Room safely locked and enchanted.

Bellatrix, Yaxley and his father were all grouped around the fire, laughing at their latest achievement. They fell silent when Draco entered the room, scowling. He flung himself into his previously vacated chair.

"What is it Draco?" Lucius inquired.

Draco glared at the floor, his mind still on what the Lovegood girl had said.

"Why couldn't you just kill her, rather than hold her hostage?"

Bellatrix's smile vanished and turned to a snarl of contempt and loathing.

"_How dare you question the Dark Lord?_ He commands it, so we do it. He said the Lovegood girl was not to be harmed, so we do not question that!"

Her eyes were narrowed slits but Draco did not look away from her burning gaze.

"Fine. But someone else will have to guard her, I don't want to be near her."

Now Lucius looked stern too.

"You will do as you are asked, Draco. This is for the Dark Lord, remember, you will do all and anything he asks of us, and that includes you."

Draco stood, hands balled into fists. He wanted to argue but he knew better, so he resigned himself to his fate. He trudged back down the stairs.

He didn't know that he was going to have to guard himself as much as Luna.

She was sitting in a corner, her back pressed up against the stone walls. She was not crying, or shaking. She didn't even look scared. She gazed out into the darkness, expressionless, unmoving.

She did not stir as he entered the room, nor when he leaned against the wall opposite her. He watched her for a time, then he broke the silence.

"What are you staring at?" he sneered.

She did not answer at first, but a slight smile lifted her lips.

"The Wrackspurt that flew in with you." She said. Not for the first time, Draco wondered if she was a little mad. Shaking his head he stood silent for a while, a shadowed statue.

"It's all right you know." she said, turning her misty gaze on him.

"What are you talking about?" he replied.

She didn't say anything for a moment.

"It's all right, if you aren't like them."

The anger flared again, but he kept it in check this time.

"You're wrong." He said.

"About what?" she asked.

He swallowed, his mouth suddenly dry.

"I am loyal to the Dark Lord, and am glad to do his bidding."

She looked away from him, and said,

"Keep telling yourself that, but you couldn't kill Professor Dumbledore."

His muscles tightened, and again anger rose in his throat like bile.

"I wasn't ready. I am now, and if I was back there now I wouldn't have hesitated."

This wasn't true. If Draco had been back in Dumbledore's office right now, he would have beseeched the old man to hide him, and leave his bloodthirsty family and the rest behind.

He would have, if he could have.

He found it miraculous that she was even talking to him after he had tortured her. Perhaps she was made of stronger stuff than they would like to admit, maybe that was why Voldemort wanted her alive, perhaps he had hopes of turning her into a Death Eater. He very much doubted that she would ever turn to their side though, she was strong, this one. Her mind wouldn't be so easily bent to their wishes.

They didn't speak for a long time. She occasionally dabbed at her bleeding forearms, but other than that she made no further conversation. Draco was eager for midnight to come so he could leave this dismal place. He was again reminded if why he had dubbed it the _Désespoir _Room, for it seemed to sap his energy and his willpower. He wondered if the room was having the same effect on Luna.

When he glanced over at her, he saw that she was sleeping. Her head was bowed, and her mouth was opened slightly. He sighed, wishing he could sleep too. He checked his watch, _11:53_, close enough, he thought, easing open the door and closing it behind him, locking it with the usual enchantments.

Bellatrix bowed so low that he was sure she might stumble over. He watched her with cool indifference, but listening intently when she spoke.

"My Lord," she said. "It pains me to bring you such news, but…" she paused, searching his face. "It hurts me to speak ill of my family, but I believe that Draco may be a problem, even a threat."

"How so?" he asked, though he thought he might already know.

"He is weak." She said. "He shows the same ineptitude at guarding the girl, as he showed when he was trying to kill the old man. He shows continuous reluctance to perform even the slightest task for you, he refuses to kill, he often can't bring himself to torture. He often shows sympathy and betrays weakness. He could seriously damage our plans and missions. He also shows signs of…wanting to go back. Of regret. He…" she swallowed, knowing full well what the consequences of her next words would be. "I don't think he can be trusted."

"Very well," Voldemort said calmly. "We shall test his loyalty."

Draco awoke early each day, dreading his guard shift. Though when he went down the stairs to the Great Room, he was met with an unpleasant surprise. Voldemort was sitting at the long table with its back to the fire, Nagini the snake twisting around the huge white columns that held up the roof.

Voldemort had his head bowed, chin resting on his spider-like fingers that were steepled together. Upon Draco's arrival, he raised his snakelike face to watch Draco bend from the waist in a stiff bow.

Voldemort smiled, a terrible, humorless smile.

"Sit, Draco." He said.

Draco obeyed, sitting in the chair directly opposite his. Silently, Lucius, Narcissa and Bellatrix took seats at the table as well, Bellatrix sitting closest to Voldemort.

"Draco, I have been told that you are…displeased with the duties assigned to you. That perhaps such things are…beneath you. Do you think that watching the girl is too meager a task for you?"

Draco's face hardened at the mention of Luna. Voldemort seemed to notice, for his hideous smile widened even further, the fire crackling behind him, shadows leaping on the walls behind him.

"But perhaps you are suited to only the easiest meager tasks, for you were unable to kill Albus Dumbledore. Lord Voldemort does not forget, you see. Did you not assure me that you could do it? That you would be able to kill an old man?" his voice was low and quiet, and Draco felt his stomach turning and knotting, a feeling of trepidation clenching his heart.

"Perhaps we should have you join her, and after a few days down there, see if you are ready to do what we ask."

Draco said nothing, but his emotion showed clearly on his pale face.

"But we have a more suitable task, one we hope you complete with more…success, than the last one I gave you."

Draco felt panic leaping in his chest, scratching at his bones.

"Bellatrix, fetch the girl." Bellatrix stood without a word and made her way down the stairs, her footfalls echoing in the marble hallways.

She came back up dragging Luna by the arm. There was no smile on Luna's face. Draco even saw a flicker of fear in her wide eyes. He thought he knew what was coming, and his stomach writhed like snakes. A Death Eater he may be, but a killer he was not, regardless of what he had told Luna.

Voldemort looked around at them all, his smile more dangerous that than his curses.

"Draco," he said quietly.

Draco stood, his wand shaking in his hand, as he advanced on Luna. Bellatrix released her, stepping away, a hungry look on her face. Luna's eyes gazed into his, and he felt that he could not look away, he could not bear to see the light in those eyes vanish at his hands.

"No." he whispered, tearing himself away from her.

"What did you say?" Voldemort said, his voice full of malice.

"No." Draco said more loudly.

"I won't do it."

He saw his parents' horrified expression, and Voldemort's satisfied one.

He saw Voldemort wave his wand, felt his own fly out of his hand before darkness was forced upon him, and he felt no more.


	4. Angry

_**Chapter 3**__**: **__**Angry**_

__For eight days Draco was silent. For eight days he sat with no other company than Luna Lovegood, and the only noise she made was her light humming.

For what seemed to be an eternity, Draco was angry.

He thought that Luna knew it, because she left him alone, they had not spoken a word to each other since Draco's first day here.

He had woken in the dark, the freezing stone at his back, Luna sitting beside him, her pale eyes wide and fearful.

"You didn't have to do that." She said. "It was really brave of you, but—"

"Brave?" he interrupted her. "It wasn't brave it was stupid. Now look! I'm a prisoner in my own house, because of you! Being a Death Eater comes with a license to kill, whether you want it or not." He pounded his fist against the floor, tearing flesh and letting the blood flow.

Luna didn't speak again after that, as Draco yelled. She just bowed her head, the tears falling from her eyes, realizing what it had cost Draco his freedom to buy her time.

That night, the eighth night, Luna spoke.

"Draco?" she said, her voice seeming as loud as an explosion in the dead silence. Draco continued to stare at the wall, as if hoping he could bore a hole in the wall to escape through.

_Hatred._

That's why he wouldn't speak, he felt too full of _hatred._ Hatred for Voldemort, who had cast him here. Hatred for his parents for not speaking on his behalf, hatred for Bellatrix who had sneered at him as she led him to eight damn days of solitary. Hatred for Luna for being the reason he was here. But most of all, Draco felt hatred for himself for being duped into believing he was on the right side of the war. The winning side perhaps, with the Ministry under their control, and the Wizarding World at their disposal.

_Hatred. Anger. Resentment._

That's what he felt.

That's why on the eighth night, he spoke for the first time.

"You were right."


	5. Plans

_**Chapter 4**__**: **__**Plans**_

That was how it began. Luna and his grand plans for escape.

They had no parchment or ink to plan with, but they did have the rusty nail to scratch at the walls with, and their memories.

Their plan was simple, but unlikely. It was also their only chance, so they worked on it every day, talking in whispers or silence. They just needed a wand.

They planned this all in two weeks, going on nothing more than skill, chance, and the possibility of disaster. They finished planning on the twenty-second day, but they did not have their chance until the forty-ninth.

The door scraped against the stone, and a voice called through,

"Stand against the wall! Put your hands where I can see them!" this was their usual orders. However, the voice of Wormtail brought no fear for them. Draco motioned to Luna in the darkness, and they stood on either side of the door, blending into the dark, hardly daring to breath.

The door cracked open, and a golden strip of light fell into the shadows. Perhaps Wormtail blamed it on the poor lightening to their apparent absence. He stepped forward into the room, his eyes slightly out of focus, not used to the cruel darkness. A tray of food and a water jug was balanced in one hand, while his wand was trained on the room ahead of him.

Draco nodded to Luna, but his movement must have been noticed by Wormtail for he opened his mouth wide, the tray clattering to the ground. Luna grabbed his wand hand and wrestled the wand from it. Draco tackled him to the ground, listening furiously for any noises coming from the upstairs. Hearing none, he looked at Luna trying to communicate without words to put him under the Imperious Curse. To his relief, she seemed to understand, pointing the wand at Wormtail's terrified face, whispering, _"Imperio."_

Wormtail immediately stopped struggling, his face utterly expressionless. She flicked her wand, and he stood, and resumed talking.

"It's more than you deserve, filthy traitors. If I had it my way, you wouldn't be brought food at all."

He spat on the ground.

"_Germinio._" Luna whispered, and an identical, but useless wand was thrust into Dawlish's hand.

"_Obliviate._" She said. She rearranged the food on the tray, shoved it into his hands, and handed the wand to Draco, who tucked it into his waistband. The Imperious Curse broken a second later, and Wormtail stood there, with no recollection of what had just happened, as he wordlessly placed the tray on the stone floor, and closed the door. A click of the key in the lock could be heard, and Luna and Draco silently celebrated their victory.

"We did it!" Draco whispered as he embraced Luna. She beamed at him as he pulled the stolen wand out and examined it. It was short and made of a rough, light brown wood, possibly elm. He passed it to Luna.

"So," he said, smiling.

"What do you think you'll be? They say you can't pick when you become an Animagus."


	6. Away

_**Chapter 5**__**: **__**Away**_

It took eight months and four days in the _Désespoir _Room for Luna and Draco to achieve what they had been planning for almost a year. Draco had studied Anamagi in his remaining time at Hogwarts with Professor McGonagall. He knew how to do it, and he knew what they were doing was illegal, though that was of next to no importance now. The months had passed in a haze of pain, thanks to the countless spells, hexes and curses Bellatrix and other Death Eaters 'practiced' on them. The worst had been when Draco had broken a rib when Bellatrix sent him flying into the stone wall, though his mother had sneaked him some Skellagrow in his food.

So here they were, eight months and four days later, within the dark stone walls that Draco called the _Désespoir _Room. It was the darkest part of the night, not quite Midnight, according to Draco's watch. The stolen wand lay between them, covered by a blanket of shadows, the only light being from the crack under the heavy stone door. Draco and Luna were crouched on the ground, that wand between them, and for a long moment, they looked at each other.

"You first." Draco said thinking she desered to be out of here more than he did. Luna nodded and reached for the wand. She closed her eyes, breathed deeply, than pressed the tip of the wand to her head, the last part of the spell that would complete the Animagus process. Luna whispered the incantation, then dropped the wand with a gasp, falling backwards to the floor, clutching her skull.

"Luna," Draco whispered, hurrying over to her. Her eyes changed first, but not much. Their deep blue turned amber, and her skin turning light brown, its texture changing into soft feathers. His hand that had been supporting her head fell back in astonishment, for Luna's wings had lifted her off the stone floor. The huge barn owl circled the room once, twice, than dropped to the floor as Luna, her smile wide.

She thrust the wand at him, whispering, "Your turn."

He repeated the process, and he felt pain in his muscles, that seemed to be clenching and contracting. It was painful, but according to McGonagall that stopped after the first few transformations. When the pain receded, he looked at his surroundings as if they were in sunlight. His senses seemed to have become ten times keener, his powerful back legs clearly built for speed, his clawed feet a powerful weapon, as were his sharp fangs. His long tail just another reminder that he was now an animal. The white wolf looked at Luna through new eyes, and he again envisioned her the day he had first seen her, fresh and free.

_Free._

That's what they would be now. He concentrated on Draco Malfoy, his human form, and he felt again that strange sensation that his muscles and bones were being stretched and rearranged. He looked down at his now claw-less hands. When he glanced up again, he saw Luna staring at the ceiling, and he knew she was remembering how the air had slid under her feathers, flying. Free.

He gave a silent whoop of joy, and hugged her. She rested her face against his chest for a moment, then they broke apart.

"Where will we go?" he asked. She answered without hesitation.

"My house. Daddy built a safe room under the bottom floor in case Blibbering Humdingers broke through the Dirigible Plum barricade."

Draco decided not to comment on the Blibbering Humdingers, but he nodded his approval of this hiding place, he knew the protective enchantments that would protect them from the Death Eaters.

Two days later, they seized their chance. Narcissa Malfoy, thin and pale, opened the door, to see nothing but darkness. She drew her wand, whispered _"Lumos."_, but still nothing. She quickly glanced from side to side, thinking of ambush. Still, nothing. She carefully advanced into the room, wary.

"Show yourselves." She commanded.

_Nothing._

Narcissa turned to see something that made her heart do a sort of back flip. A huge barn owl and a large white wolf were running and flying up the stairs, the protective enchantments had been let down for her to bring them food and water. At first she did not understand, but after a moment,

"_Bella! Lucius! _They've escaped!"

Draco felt his heart hammering in the wolf's chest. Luna soared above him, above the head of Dolohov, who appeared out of nowhere. He raised his wand, his mouth open, a curse forming on his lips, but Draco fastened his sharp fangs in the man's arm. It was strange to find such a thing in his own mouth, and Draco quickly released it when he felt blood trickling in his mouth. Dolohov fell to the ground, screaming and writing in pain. Luna swooped low over Bellatrix, her claws extended in an attempt to give her a few good scratches. But Bellatrix was quicker than Dolohov, and screamed _"Stupify!"_.

The well aimed spell hit Luna and she fell to the ground. Bellatrix's scream of triumph was lost in Draco's howl. He ran to Luna as Bellatrix brought her foot down on Luna's wing. Draco heard a sickening _snap, _and Luna's wing flopped awkwardly at her side.

When Draco reached her, he snarled at Bellatrix who backed away, her wand still raised. Draco gently grabbed Luna in his teeth, and ran for the exit, using his highly acute senses to dodge the rain of hexes and curses. The door stood open in front of him, and he leaped into the air, the limp owl still in his jaws as his front paws slammed into the door, which opened under his massive weight.


	7. TrustMeNot

_**Chapter 6**__**: **__**Trust**__**-**__**Me**__**-**__**Not**_

Draco did not know how long he ran. Once he had broken through the enchantments with the borrowed wand he ran without a second thought, passing houses and trees and feeling the wind rushing behind him. He ran until his muscles ached, and he stopped by a large glassy lake. There was a surrounding forest dappled with a chiaroscuro of starlight and shade. The brittle grass was still bravely poking through the freshly fallen snow. After the almost full year of imprisonment, the cold air felt wonderful flowing through his white fur.

He laid Luna down gently on the tall grass, then changed back into his human form. He pulled the wand out of his pocket and performed the spell that forced humans out of their Animagus state. The moonlight spilled upon her prone form, and the blood seeping from her arm turned silver. He wasn't sure what to do, he had never had an injury away from Hogwarts or home.

He dared not _Enervate_ her, fearing for the pain she would be in upon awakening. He paced back and forth, trying to make up his mind. He had two options, as he could see it He could leave her here, and escape, bettering his own chances of survival and freedom, or he could stay and help the one person who had never betrayed him. After all, she had helped him, when they were alone in the _Désespoir _Room, but still, he did not entirely trust her. She was so odd, so unreadable that you could never tell for sure what she was thinking. She however, could read almost anyone. She had been right about him, even after the cruelty he had shown her on that first day of her imprisonment. He didn't want to be on the run alone, but he didn't want to be on the run with someone he couldn't understand even less with someone he couldn't trust. She was so strange…she saw things in a way no one else did, she believed in the most ludicrous things, no matter what anyone else said.

But he had trusted her to help him, and she had. But perhaps that was because she had been desperate to leave that godforsaken place. It's what he would have done anyway.

_But not everybody's like you, Draco. _A quiet voice whispered in his head.

This made him feel even more confused.

"I'll just have to wait it out, won't I?"

A sudden though flashed through his head.

_Dittany. _What did dittany look like? It wasn't likely to be growing in this lonely copse of trees. In desperation, he pulled out the wand and whispered, _"Reparo." _To his amazement, her arm snapped back into place with a sickening _crack!_

He felt it was now safe to wake her.

"_Enervate._"

Luna gasped, her eyes fluttering open. Seeing Draco's looming silhouette with his wand still pointed at her made her shrink back, attempting to crawl away from him.

"Luna it's me," he knelt down, whispering, _"Lumos."_ His wand light illuminated her face as her expression as it changed from fear to realization.

"Oh." She smiled, relief in her face.

"Where are we?" she asked as he pulled her to her feet.

"I don't know, far away from Malfoy Manor anyway." He replied.

"Well that's good enough for me." she said, still smiling.

"Yeah, me too, though there isn't much to eat here, but there's a lake, so we have water."

He sat down on the protruding roots of a nearby oak tree, and looked up at Luna. She was looking at her arm, which looked a little crooked. The spell he used to mend her bones was crude, but it was all he could think of. She would probably have a scar, but that seemed a small price to pay. Being with her made him edgy and uncomfortable. He once again wondered if he could trust her.

He stood again, and strode over to the lake, and cupped his hands in its icy depths, bringing them to his mouth. Most of the water splashed onto his shirt soaking his already icy skin. Cursing under his breath, he pulled the shirt off and transformed into the wolf. He lapped at the water like a dog, his thick fur shielding him from the cold winter night.

The same could not be said for Luna, who, even in her Animagus form would not be much warmer. He could see that she was freezing by the way she hugged herself, her slim frame trembling. If their places had been reversed, he would have been miserable, though she looked quite the opposite, a lazy smile on her face, her large eyes fixed on the moon overhead. He felt a pang of sympathy for her, and he padded over to her through the light cover of snow.

He nosed her leg and gave a jerk of his head that indicated he wished her to follow him. He lay down on the snow, and she seemed to understand. She lay down beside him, and he placed his huge paw over her. She leaned into his warmth, and after a matter of minutes, her breathing slowed, and he knew she was asleep. The wolf's eyes too were closing rapidly, and the last thing he thought before he drifted off to sleep was how nice it felt to have Luna beside him as he slept.


	8. Blue Red Green Purple Yellow Black White

_**Chapter 7**__**: **__**Blue**____**Red**____**Green**____**Purple**____**Yellow**__** Black **__**White**_

Draco woke early in the morning. The sun had not yet risen, though the horizon was light. A light mist had descended, and the first thing that Draco felt that morning was a sickening wetness in his fur that meant that some of the snow had melted. The second was an absence. It took him a moment to realize what was missing. Luna was gone. Unbidden, unwelcome thoughts and imaginings crept into his mind as he leapt to his feet. The wolf's senses were acute, and he listened intently for sounds, for anything to indicate where Luna was, because he could not see or hear her within twenty feet of the clearing around the lake.

_I knew it._ He thought, _I knew I couldn't trust her._ _She's left me here alone because she knew I didn't trust her. _As he ran through the trees, the futile hope that she had just gone for a walk, or to look for food, or something, _anything_ but face the truth that his one link to the right side of the war had _used him_. Like his parents, like his aunt, like his wicked former master. She had used him. Just like everyone else. She must have left before he woke, and wiped her footprints with magic. He felt rage coursing through him as he ran, though his powerful muscles ached.

_Hatred. Anger. Resentment._

And _pain_.

He felt pain in his heart, mind and soul. He felt it in his tired muscles and his aching bones. He felt it in every fiber of his being, and it made him wish he didn't have to feel.

_Who will she tell?_ He wondered. _Who will she tell that she caught a Death Eater?_

When Draco got back to the lakeside, the sun was low on the horizon, turning the thick white clouds a pearly pink. He flung himself down by the same tree as before, and waited for sleep to claim him.

He woke the next morning to a sound, a light, musical…strange sound. He did not spring to his feet however, for he was hoping against hope it was Luna. The sound grew closer and louder, and Draco could see a figure was walking through the twisted limbs and trailing leaves of the trees. Pale as a ghost, she moved closer, the whispering wind tangling her hair and fluttering at her dirty clothes. She was singing, or humming, some strange words or tune he couldn't understand. He closed his eyes in relief. It was Luna, she had come back.

"Where were you?"

The question seemed to surprise Luna, she let her hands drift through the cold water where she had been drinking. She turned around to face him.

"I was looking," she said.

"Looking for what?"

She paused before answering.

"Blibbering Humdingers. I heard one and I followed it to its nest."

He gaped at her.

"A Blibbering _what_?"

She smiled.

"A Blibbering Humdinger. They're awfully rare in this area, but I found it."

He shook his head incredulously. _She was mental. Absolutely mental. A Blubbering Hummbugger or whatever it was called? What rubbish. Where was she really going? _Draco was determined to find out.

Luna continued to disappear for hours on end throughout the next few days. Everytime Draco saw this, he felt anger boiling in his blood and worst of all, a cold feeling of fear that the next time, she wouldn't come back. He had refrained from following her, because for all his suspicions that she was deceiving him, he couldn't bear to think that the pale girl who had saved him not only from the darkness of the _Désespoir _Room, but from his own darkness, was betraying him. The side of him that had been loyal to Voldemort. The part of him that still didn't trust her.

The afternoon came and went in a haze of golden sunlight, and was quickly swept aside by the dark hands of dusk. The evening air was heavy and clouds had gathered, threatening snow with every gust of wind. Draco had conjured a fire with his wand, and was sitting on an overturned log, changing the color of the leaping flames for his own amusement.

_**Blue**__._

She sat next to him on the log.

_**Red.**_

She stared into the flames.

_**Green.**_

She twisted her hands in her lap.

_**Purple.**_

She opened her mouth to speak.

_**Yellow.**_

She got up and left.

_**Black. **_

He continued to stare into the fire, brow furrowed.

_**White.**_

He wondered why he felt so cold sitting next to a fire.


	9. Fireflies

_**Chapter 8**__**: Fireflies**_

It was so dark that Draco could barely see as he wove and ducked through the hanging limbs and trailing leaves of the surrounding trees. He didn't light his wand however, for it would most certainly give him away. Luna walked a few dozen yards in front of him, her pale skin glowing white in the shadows, making her easy to follow. There was no moon, and few stars were visible, the patchy cloud cover that had lingered for so long drifted across the sky.

Luna glided, ghost-like through the shadows, humming a quiet tune and carelessly picking her way through the tangles of thorns. She had wandered aimlessly like this for the past ten minutes, and Draco had wondered if she had any destination at all.

Another few minutes and she stopped, and Draco slid into the darkness. She gazed around, her wide eyes taking in every detail. She dropped to the ground and wrapped her arms around her knees, humming. Draco stepped forward, and a twig snapped under his foot. Luna's head snapped up and she looked around, hurriedly standing. Draco tried to remain still, but his hastily stifled curse had not gone unnoticed.

Her eyes widened when she recognized him. His face flushed with a mixture of shame and humiliation.

"You followed me?"

Her voice was barely more than a whisper, but Draco flinched as if she had shouted. He bowed his head in shame, refusing to meet her gaze, not wanting to see anger there. He heard the crackling of leaves and frost underfoot that meant she was moving closer to him. He raised his head, unwilling to look at her but doing so anyways.

It was worse that hate. It was worse than anger. She was looking at him withpity.

"Draco, I know how hard it is for you to trust me, but we escaped together, we are fighting Voldemort together. We're friends."

Pity.

"Friends?" he whispered.

The word felt unfamiliar on his tongue, for he had never used it before concerning a person in relation to himself. Crabbe and Goyle had been mere muscle, not real friendship, and Pansy's unfathomable attraction to him had been irksome.

"How can we be friends if I can't trust you? You sneak away at night, doing who knows what at god knows where!" His voice was rising, and echoing in the stillness of the night. All the pent up frustration and horrible doubts and fear that he had been feeling ever since the first time she had left was streaming out of him like a tsunami.

He thought he saw tears in her eyes, but he couldn't be sure. He felt his heart lurch, he could not bear to see her in pain. He realized this without conscious thought. She reached for his hand, but he flinched away. She withdrew slightly, then took hold of it. Her skin was warm and smooth, and Draco felt his anger drain out of him replaced by regret.

She guided him toward the trees, and now they were thrown in total darkness. She pulled her wand out, and she waved it a few times, shooting out tiny jets of multicolored sparks. Tiny fireworks. She directed the sparks at a stunted tree overrun with nettles and moss.

At once, dozens of tiny little glowing creatures emerged from the apparently hollow tree, swarming into the night sky, circling them, weaving in and out of the branches and swirling between them. They lingered for a moment, and then spread through the trees.

Luna turned to face him, and Draco saw her slight smile, drawing strength from it. One of the glowing things landed on Draco's hand, and he examined the tiny bug. It was a firefly. It took flight quickly, disappearing quickly like its fellows.

"Blibbering Humdingers." She said.

Draco almost laughed.

"Luna," he said,

"They're fireflies."

Her smile widened.

"No, those are definitely Blibbering Humdingers. They have tiny little purple spots on their wings that you can only see with ___Spectre Specs."_

___ Draco shook his head deciding it was best not to argue with her._

_ Now things were quiet, peaceful. They had talked a little about going to Luna's father's house, but somehow, they had never left. Draco had been reluctant to leave this quiet clearing by the lake. It had been a kind of home. But the snow was getting thicker and heavier, and the thin tents conjured by Draco did not help much against the cold. So they had decided to move, and Apparat____e outside the Lovegood's house and hope that the Death Eaters hadn't been there. _

_ It was a chilly morning with weak sunlight filtering through the empty branches when Luna took hold of Draco's arm____, and they cast a last glance around their sanctuary, which had felt more like home to him than Malfoy Manor ever had. Luna smiled fondly as they passed by the little blue flowers she had grown with the stolen wand. The lake had frozen over and the snow was a foot deep. It was time to leave._

___Luna took tightened her grip on his arm, and they turned into the crushing darkness together.__ Draco's lungs filled with the cold clean air of moor, and the first thing his eyes found was the silhouette of a cylindrical building. Luna smiled in the building's direction, and started forward. Draco followed, eager to be out of the cold._

___It was only when they reached the gate that__ Draco knew something was wrong. There was a gaping hole in it, and he pointed it out to Luna, whose face had turned as white as the surrounding snow. Draco transformed into the wolf, and Luna into the ____barn owl__. They skulked amongst the bushes and low-hanging limbs of the surrounding gnarled trees. _

_ Draco tread carefully on the crunchy frost below him, trying not to make a sound.____ Practically invisible against the snow, he stalked closer, keeping low to the ground.__ Loud bangs were issuing from the cylindrical building, and he thought he saw a flash of light from an upper-window. His keen ears then picked up on a strange noise, that sounded like something speeding toward them—_

_ He flattened himself into the ground, fear coursing through his veins like ice, the sharp feeling pricking his heart and freezing his limbs. Luna seemed to sense his distress and pressed her feathery body closer to him. He leaned into her, and he felt himself thaw slightly. Two figures on brooms had landed near the door, two figures Draco recognized as if from an old nightmare. They were arguing, but even Draco's keen hearing couldn't pick up the words._

_ Just then, a flash of red light flared out the window, and Draco felt a sensation of being thrown backward, of knowing nothing and feeling everything, of hearing only the sound of destruction and the long piercing cry of a bird in pain._


	10. Gone

**_Chapter 9: Gone_**

Draco opened his eyes, and immediately wished he hadn't. A horrible smell of burning rubble hung thickly in the air, and the sky had been filled with a dark black smoke. There was a gaping hole in the side of the Lovegood's house, and the two Death Eaters Draco had seen before were striding away from the wreckage of the Lovegood's house, dragging an unconscious figure behind them.

_Luna's father. _Draco thought. _Luna._ He suddenly remembered Luna, and it was all he could do to keep himself rooted to the spot, lest he give away his position. He could now fully hear the Death Eaters' argument, and he pricked up his ears to listen.

"—stupid old nutter, letting Potter get away like that—"

_Potter. So Potter had been to see old Lovegood too, but why?_

"—when the Dark Lord hears about this Travers—"

_Travers. _Draco wracked his brain for the other man's name, finally reaching it.

_Selwyn. Selwyn and Travers. _

"—at least he'll be with his stupid daughter and he might shut up for once about her—"

He felt like laughing, despite the perilous situation.

_So, _he thought. _Voldemort does not wish his failures to become public knowledge. _

He glanced around, looking for a flash of amber eyes, or a glimpse of dappled feathers that was Luna.

"—couldn't believe what Bellatrix said about Draco, turning on them like that—"

_Wait. If they knew about him escaping, why didn't they know about Luna? Unless—_

Draco exploded out of the underbrush, not caring about alerting them to his presence, not caring about the fact that both men had raised their wands, not caring about the fact he was probably about to die. He was livid, his veins seemed to have frozen and his mind glazed over. His sharp fangs plunged into Travers' arm, causing him to yell in pain and send his wand flying out of his hand. Selwyn aimed a jinx at Draco but he leapt aside, howling, angrier then he had ever been in his life.

Now that he was close to the Death Eaters, he could see Luna's prone figure, her arms no longer wings, her body no longer bird, her arm being gripped by Selwyn's free hand. Draco snarled and dove at the sneering man, dragging his claws across his face until blood flowed. Selwyn's scream was drowned by Travers' curse that hit Draco in the chest. Draco was blasted backward, slammed against a stunted tree, then crumpled to the ground, winded. He tried to struggle to his feet, but his ribs felt splintered and his heart felt dead.

He could hear the two Death Eaters approach him, and Selwyn pointed his wand at Draco.

_"Protego."_ Before Draco even could even stand, Selwyn spoke.

Draco changed back to human form, pulling out his wand, clutching his chest.

"Hello Draco." Selwyn said.

Draco said nothing, he just stood there, shaking he was so angry.

"Kill mw then. Kill me, for realizing what good and evil really were."

"Good and evil?" Travers laughed. "There is no good and evil Draco, there is only this, and who wins. There is truth, and lies, but no justice. And no mercy. Not in this world anyway."

"Still," Draco said. "If I die now, I'll die knowing who I am, and why. I'll die free."

"Free?" said Selwyn. "You'll never be free, boy. The Dark Lord may hav agreed that you should be allowed back into the fold, if we disposed of the girl, but you'll never be free, not after you helped her escape."

Draco spat at them. He aimed a hex at the protective shield, but it just bounced off and hit the dilapidated fence, singing a hole in it. He struck out, punching the shield with his bare fist, but bringing it back with a howl of pain, the bones splintered and skin burned. He cradled his hand with his free one, and glared up at the leering Death Eaters, and felt a wolfish snarl curl his lip.

Travers chuckled under his breath.

Selwyn laughed, and he and Travers walked away, mounted their brooms, disappearing long before the effects of the Shield Charm wore off.

Draco fell to his knees in the snow, his face in his hands.

_She was gone._ Actually _gone_. Taken by Death Eaters. _I have to go back. _He thought. The truth of that statement burned cold in his heart.

That was what it meant to be friends. To be willing to do anything for them. And Draco was willing, he was willing to forfeit his longed for freedom to save her, Luna.

Shaking, he stood, drew his wand, and turned on the spot, thinking of a towering building, in which, deep, _deep_, down, below its foundations, was a dark, dank room that was named for the feeling that so often imprisoned the poor soul in its depths. The room that now most probably held Luna. The room he and her had escaped from. The _Désespoir_ Room.


	11. HIATUS

If you haven't already noticed, this story is currently on hiatus, because until vacations or the summer, I have _no_ time to write. It is much to my regret, but also unavoidable….

So, I will see you when I can those few fans of mine :D

So, until next time:

xoxo

~Your Angel


	12. Important! Please Read!

Hello my treasure readers! If you have already read this story and are paitently waiting, (as you have been for months :D ) then _**please read this carefully! **_I cannot stress this enough! I have recently started my work on this story again, and I drastically edited it, and though not much is different plot-wise, I have matured the vocabulary, concepts, and just general style of the previous chapters, and it will probably be important in later chapters for you to re-read this story and make sure you notice what I have changed. There are several changes, (some important and some not), in every chapter, and again, these alterations will most likely be important in later chapters, so _**please re-read the last nine chapters!**_Sorry for the inconvenience, but really, all these chapters are short, so it'll only take like an hour or two.

If you are reading this story for the first time, you need not worry. It's just for those who have already started For The Times That We Were Free. If you are a first-timer, disregard this, it doesn't matter for you.

I hope to see you all in my future and upcoming chapters! I appreciate all feedback, comments and criticism that you send my way, though pointless criticism and witless comments are seriously _not tolerated here._ If you want to give me a flame, go right ahead, but I really don't care if you don't like a decision I made or a detail _you_ personally found distasteful, seriously keep it to yourself.

Again, many thanks to my readers and reviewers, I love you all :D And I hope you will all love the new chapters coming and the adjustments I made to the previous chapters. :D

xoxo

~Your Angel


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